Tag Archive: New Zealand

banned baby names

The spawn of Hollywood celebrities will probably want to avoid giving birth in New Zealand in the future. The annoying trend of bequeathing ridiculous names to one’s offspring will no longer be tolerated in the island nation, according to CNN.

The country’s Registrar of Births, Deaths and Marriages is banning “weird” baby names: the current list includes Lucifer, Duke, Messiah, and 89 (let’s hope that’s not his/her birth order). Bishop, Baron, General, Judge, King, Knight, and Mr. were said to be too similar to titles. And letters such as C, D, I, and T and names involving punctuation marks? Nope.

In 2008, New Zealand’s names registrar approved non-traditional names (there’s a set of twins out there named Benson and Hedges). Apparently, circumstances or places of conception were also cool as namesakes. Hence, Violence and Number 16 Bus Shelter. But now there’s an end to the madness, and hopefully New Zealand will once again become a nation of Liam’s and Chloe’s.

Fortunately, Sweden (sorry, Brfxxccxxmnpcccclllmmnprxvclmnckssqlbb11116, pronounced Albin) and the Dominican Republic are getting on board with banning idiotic baby names. In 2007, a Dominican judge banned “Tonton” (Dummy) Ruiz, but only because it was confusing and/or gave no indication of gender.

I’m all for foreign or original baby names (despite to this day being called “Laura/Lauren/Nora/Floral/Coral” on a daily basis). But doesn’t it constitute a form of child abuse when you stick your kid with a handle guaranteed to inspire butt-kicking on the playground? You’d better learn taekwando, Bronx Mowgli Wentz.

10 illegal baby names

These baby names have all been banned around the world for reasons of taste, decency or just plain daftness.…

This week the Pope declared war on parents naming babies after celebrities, fruit or popular sports cars. In an address to parents, the ever-progressive pontiff pleaded with worshipers to ‘give your children names that are in the Christian calendar‘. So Apple, Brooklyn and Ferrari are out, Francisco and Giulia are in.

But Benedict’s not the only authority figure to stamp down on one of the sillier by-products of celebrity culture. The following names have all been banned around the world for reasons of taste, decency or just plain daftness.

1) Talula Does The Hula From Hawaii (New Zealand)

New Zealand law bans names which could cause offence to a ‘reasonable’ person. Good thing too – the country is a stupid name hotspot. We found a couple from the islands who tried and failed to call their son ‘4Real’, but nothing beats the ridiculous moniker above. It belonged to a 9-year-old girl before a judge had her renamed during a custody battle. ‘It makes a fool of the child,’ he said. It certainly made application forms a pain in the butt.

Has New Zealand banned any other names? Oh yes. The judge listed some that were also blocked: Fish and Chips (twins), Yeah Detroit, Keenan Got Lucy and Sex Fruit. Number 16 Bus Shelter and Violence were allowed.

2) Venerdi AKA ‘Friday’ (Italy)

Maybe this is what the Pope was talking about. Back in 2008 a court banned an Italian couple from calling their child Venerdi (translation: Friday). The judges reckoned the name – taken from ‘Robinson Crusoe’ – would expose the boy to ‘mockery’ and was associated with ‘subservience and insecurity’. The parents, however, might have the last laugh; they threatened to call their next child Mercoledi (Wednesday).

Has Italy banned any other names? Italian courts can step in ‘when the child’s name is likely to limit social interaction and create insecurity’. In Turin, Andrea was rejected (and changed to Emma) as it’s a boy’s name in Italy. Dalmata has also been rejected, as it means Dalmatian.

3) Brfxxccxxmnpcccclllmmnprxvclmnckssqlbb11116 (Sweden) 
No, we didn’t fall asleep on the keyboard. That is an actual name a Swedish couple tried to inflict on their son back in 1996. Apparently the name is pronounced ‘Albin’ (we’re not sure how), and the parents chose it as a protest against Sweden’s admittedly strict naming laws. Tax authorities must give their blessing to both first and surnames before they can be used.

Has Sweden banned any other names? Oh yes. Some favourites include Metallica, IKEA, Veranda and Q. Google was OK though.

4) Gesher AKA ‘Bridge’ (Norway)
Back in 1998 those nasty Norwegians threw a woman in jail (admittedly for only two days) when she failed to pay a fine for giving her son an ‘unapproved’ name. Eccentric Kristi Larsen said she was instructed in a dream to name her son Gesher (Hebrew for ‘Bridge’), but the court were having none of it. Kristi did have 13 children already though, so maybe she had just run out of ideas.

Has Norway banned any other names? Undoubtedly, though in recent times they have replaced their list of officially sanctioned names with a general ban on monikers featuring swearing, sex and illnesses.

5) Chow Tow AKA ‘Smelly Head’ (Malaysia)
Unlike many countries which are gradually relaxing name laws, Malaysian authorities have cracked down on unsuitable titles in recent years. In 2006 government killjoys published a list of undesirable names that weren’t in keeping with the religious traditions of the country – such as Cantonese moniker Chow Tow – which means ‘Smelly Head’.

Has Malaysia banned any other names? Lots more Chinese efforts such as Ah Chwar (‘Snake’), Khiow Khoo (‘Hunchback’), Sor Chai (‘Insane’). Malays should also steer clear of Woti, which means ‘Sexual Intercourse‘.

6) @ (China)
With more than a billion fellow countrymen, finding a unique name in China is difficult. Perhaps that’s why one couple called their baby the ‘@’ symbol – in Chinese characters it apparently looks a bit like ‘love him’. Bless. Unsurprisingly, however, the authorities were less sentimental and publicised the moniker as an example of citizens bringing bizarre names into the Chinese language.

Has China banned any other names? The police have control over all names given to children because they issue identity cards, but details of rejections are not widely circulated.

7) Miatt (Germany)
Country living up to stereotype alert! Surprise, surprise the Germans are somewhat officious when it comes to baby naming laws. Regulation-loving Deutschland has an entire department (the Standesamt) which decides if names are suitable. Miatt was rejected because it didn’t clearly show whether the child was a boy or a girl, but sometimes the decisions are somewhat arbitrary…

Has Germany banned any other names? The likes of Stompie, Woodstock and Grammophon were turned down, whereas the similarly strange Speedy, Lafayette and Jazz were allowed.

8) Anus (Denmark)

What is it about Scandinavian countries and name laws? The Danes are even tougher than the Swedes in this regard, with parents given 7,000-odd names to choose from by the government. Special permission is needed to deviate from the list, with ethnic names, odd spellings and even compound surnames forbidden. Luckily for him (we assume it’s a ‘he’), Anus was one of 250-odd names rejected each year.

Has Denmark banned any other names? Well, Pluto and Monkey had lucky escapes…

9) Ovnis (Portugal)

Before naming your child in Portugal, best consult this mammoth, 80-page government doc(and have it translated to English) that tells you which names you can and can’t use. It’s pretty strict (and random) – Tomás is OK but Tom isn’t – and celebs can forget about the likes of Apple and Brooklyn, which aren’t even on the banned list. Essex girls rejoice, however – Mercedes is allowed!

Has Portugal banned any other names? There are more than 2,000 names on the reject list, including Ovnis – Portuguese for UFO.

10) Akuma AKA Devil (Japan)
Here’s a name the Pope definitely wouldn’t approve of. In 1993 a Japanese parent called his son Akuma (which literally means Devil). The authorities decided this was an abuse of the parent’s rights to decide a child’s name and a lengthy court battle ensued. Eventually the father backed down and junior got a new, less demonic name.

Has Japan banned any other names? Lots. Names must use one of the 2,232 ‘name kanji’ characters decided by the government.


Giving Birth


It sounds like a scene in a movie, but a pregnant woman in New Zealand lied to police that she was about to give birth to get out of a speeding ticket.

Police were getting ready to lay spikes in the road to stop a Honda Civic speeding at more than 90 mph on a highway near Tauranga on Monday morning,according to the New Zealand Herald,

When the man driving eventually pulled over, he told police his friend was about to bring a new life into the world. She played the part, sitting with her feet spread apart on the dashboard, while the allegedly expectant father rode in the backseat, the Herald reported.

The police called for an ambulance and cordoned off the road as the paramedics arrived. Police later called the hospital to check in the patient, but discovered that that the pregnant woman discharged herself as soon as she arrived, reported theOatgo Times Daily.

“I think she’s tried using her pregnancy to put a smokescreen to give some justification for the driver’s action. It’s not just a waste of our time but a waste of the time of St John ambulance staff helping people who really need their help,” Acting Senior Sergeant Mark Holmes told the paper.

Cops later busted the 23-year-old driver for dangerous driving.

Don’t even think about naming your newborn “Lucifer” if you are a parent in New Zealand.

The devilish name has been effectively banned by the New Zealand names registrar after three sets of parents had the name denied, says The West Australian.

The Registrar of Births, Deaths and Marriages seems to be trying to curb a lifetime of inevitable taunting for the children of parents who wanted to rather than give them names, give them punctuation symbols like:

. (Full Stop), * (Asterisk) and / (presumably “Slash“)


In the past two years there have been 102 rejected names, including Baron, Bishop, Duke, General, Judge, Justice, King, Knight and Mr, all deemed too similar to titles. Messiah also got the thumbs down. The number 89, and the letters, C, D, I and T saw the same fate, reports the Herald Sun.

This seems fairly reasonable, but what the registrar’s standard is for an acceptable name is quite unclear. In 2008 it approved the names Benson and Hedges for a pair of twin boys, and also allowed parents to bestow the names Violence and Number 16 Bus Shelter to their offspring.

Perhaps, thankfully, New Zealand isn’t the only country cracking down on awful baby names.

“In 2007, a judge in the Dominican Republic submitted a proposal to ban names that are either confusing or gave no indication of gender, such as the names Qeurida Pina (Dear Pineapple) and Tonton Ruiz (Dummy Ruiz), both of which appear in the country’s civil registry,” reports The Globe and Mail.

The paper also noted that Sweden has a naming law that decides exactly what parents can call their children: Lego, Google, Superman, Metallica, Elvis, and Albin won’t cut it in Sweden.

Aigaletaule’ale’a F. Tauafiafi





The riots in Apia last weekend have challenged the role of the church in society.

Possible causes and a number of answers have unearthed with the village councils and the Police coming together to protect Samoa’s tranquility.

Prime Minister Tuilaepa Sa’ilele Malielegaoi, the matai of Apia and Matautu and the Minister of Police, Sala Pinati all agree that to church plays a vital role in order to avoid riots and civil unrest.

Reverend Nu’uausala Siaosi Siutaia, of the Apia Protestant Church, agrees.
“This is our duty, this is our work,” he said.

It’s not about getting people to go to church.
“It’s about getting people to be re-born in the church.

We can, preach and preach and preach but many times we don’t have the effect. It’s from within the person because as Paul said, ‘whoever is in Christ is reborn’.”
That’s where the answer lies and where the church needs to work, he said.

“This is it. If we fail, we are failing to produce new people for the kingdom. We should not be after church-going people because it does not necessarily mean you’re in the kingdom. That’s where my vision is.

The solution has everything to do with us, Ministers of the cloth.”
The PM Tuilaepa has said the church needs to step up to the plate.

“Church ministers need to remind and advise parents of their roles because there are times when parents lapse in their role. So when their children are involved in something like what happened and police arrest their children then they realized they haven’t done their parental duty.”

Tuilaepa added that the Government is being proactive to keep peace and order in Samoa through a couple of initiatives.
First is the increase in the number of police outposts.

“We have new ones in Afega and in Savai’i.”
He confirmed their effectiveness with the police post at Vaitele reducing the number of incidents in the neighbourhood in which he resides.
Second is increasing the number of colleges in the rural areas.

Graduating rural senior secondary schools to colleges is important “as it keeps students in their constituency and under the supervision of parents and villages. And that means they don’t come to the main centres and beyond that window of control.”
He expects a reduction in the type of school violence that briefly erupted last month as a result.

The government target is “twenty-five colleges by the beginning of next year that includes Falealili, Aleipata and also Savai’i.”
Deep in the c

entre of last weekend’s riots is Reverend Nu’uausala.
So far, the cause of the riots is still being investigated by police.

But one report says it started from a small fight between Apia and Matautu youths that escalated with the influence of parents over the two days.
The riots left physical scars on his church and emotional and spiritual wounds on the man.

But from the pain he’s come out swinging.
“In many ways we thank God for the improvements in development, our way of living and so forth but unfortunately it also develops and bring bad thing.

“And that’s a big concern”, he said.
He calls it a paradigm shift of development and Samoa is suffering its consequences.

“Because the availability of news and media and all these things have an effect through what we see and what we hear. And our youths copy and increase those bad habits coming through.”
But his main issue is with alcohol.

“In my personal view alcohol the cause. I wish the night clubs can be taken away and there are counseling services available to the people who cannot handle their liquor – this is a national problem.”

I wish said Rev. Nuuausala, “there’s a way to ban alcohol. I know it’s a bad word for those who love their beer because its something where they go to enjoy and relax but if it becomes a root of evil then where should our responsibility and priorities lie?

“Is it right to let that evil roam and be at risk to abusers? Should we let them drink to beyond their control and do nothing?”
The effect of alcohol he says paralyses, “your system, your way of thinking, your sense of balance, of morals. It’s physiological so if you drink alcohol and get drunk those are the impacts.

“But it’s the individual that is affected who inside, has the will to respond positively.”
He said for people who switch to something wild because of alcohol or drugs, “Messiah is in you and can help give them control and counter the physiological effects of the evil.”

Drugs, he said is also another key cause for the deteriorating moral fibre of youths today.
That was apparent when the church he said was deliberately attacked.

“The respect our forefathers is eroded that things supposed to be sacred. And that’s a reason for great sadness.”
The solution he said, “All of us were born with the same good and bad things in us. But its from within us where the solution is found.

“I know that because there are Reverends in the church who came from that background of gangs, drugs and so forth. And they know what happened and they know where they are now. To me that’s the only hope.”

If people know inside that they are doing something wrong then they steer away.
That’s what happened in countries where there have been a revival said Rev. Nuuausala.

“In Wales and certain parts of Europe people do not go to night clubs they no longer gambled because their lives have been changed when they have Christ in them.
“It boils down to us the church. This is our duty, this is our work.”



Urban Legend Come to Life

Too-good-to-be-true stories have circulated for years about men who accidentally fell, posterior first, onto compressed-air nozzles and self-inflated, to resemble “dough boys,” usually with fatal results. However, in May in Opotiki, New Zealand, trucker Steven McCormack found himself in similar circumstances, and had it not been for quick-thinking colleagues who pulled him away, he would have been killed — as the air, puncturing a buttock, had already begun separating tissue from muscle. McCormack was hospitalized in severe pain, but the air gradually seeped from his body (according to a doctor, in the way air “usually” seeps from a body

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